Aaj se dil pe mere, raaj tumhara...taaj tumhara!!!

He loves me so crazy that at times it scares me..but all i can think of and say is...'Alhamdolillah '
I can't believe he loves me so much and he's so pure with his feelings...how you can just bump into a guy..fall in love and it changes your whole life....

Ps. I love you!

Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?

Well, maybe it's me and my blind optimism to blame..
Or maybe it's you and your sick need to give love then take it away...
And you'll add my name to your long list of traitors who don't understand..
And I'll look back and regret how I ignored when they said, "run as fast as you can.."

Milan hoga? (1st)

Meri maa, aksar muje ek pari ki dastan sunati thi

Wo pari, jo apne dil me sab ka dard rakhti thi

Wo jis se sab bohat hi pyar krte thay

Bas us nazuk pari ko

Paristan se pre bsnay wali

Aik jadugrni, hasad ki aag me jal k

Mitana chahti thi

Phir ek shehzada a k us pri ki jaan bachata hai

Ami, wo shehzada pri ki jaan bachata hai

Lekin, dil churata hai

Usko esa dard de jata hai

Jo la dwa hota hai

Wp shehzada, us pri ki ankhon ko

Umer bhr ka intezar de jata hai

Aur apne badshah baba k agay haar jata hai

Wo pri ab b nigahen num kiye

Apne hathon ko utha k

Uski raah takti hai

Kahani me to dono mil gae thy na

Haqiqat me b mil jaen ge na????

Bataen na????

JUDAI HO GAI HAI (2ND)

Ek kahani jo meri maa, muje aksar sunati thi

Wo jis ko sun k

Meri palkon ne b kuch khwab bun dalay

Wo bachpan ki kahani nojawani me b azbr thi

Uska harf harf naqsh tha dil pe

Phir, yun hua

Wo sab kuch muj pe b beeta

Me bohat hi pursakun thi

K kahani me shehzada,

Apne badshah baba ko qayal ker k

Usi pri ko apna bna laya tha

Mgr, muj pe icke br aqs q beeta?

Me bohat hi pur yaqeen thi

K mera shehzada, meri khatir

Dukh ka her samandar paar ker jae ga

Wo duniya bhr se lr jae ga

Muje apna banae ga

Muje mnwae ga

Lekin wo muj ko aadhe rastay me chor k

Apne badshah baba ka hath thamay

Agay ja raha hai

Mur k dekhta b nahi hai

Usay dar hai

K uske sary naatay us se chut jaen ge

Jabhi wo muj se nata tor k

Muje veraniyon me chor k

Bina dekhe rawana ho gya hai

Wo kahani to mukamal ho gait hi

Meri ye dastan adhuri q hai??

Agr puri ho gai hai

to meri qismat me judai q likhi hai?

Bewafai q likhi hai?

Batao na?

Muje samjhao na…

I am here again. Another boring day at work. I am resigning after the 14 Aug leave. I have decided that.

I want to write a book someday. But would it be about? No idea. Well there is so much i wana say, i wana write, but i don't have words..poor vocabulary. I don't wana type. isnt there someone who can read my thoughts and portray them on a paper.

Men would be men. if you think you know them, you're a fool.

Oh by the way, my mehndi isn't going away this time. it has been so long since eid has passed but mehndi color is still there. Whoa.

But then, kia bharosa..mehndi k rang ka...aur mard ki mohabbat ka. :)

Why am I so down today? Internally?

ﺭﺍﺕ ﮐﺲ ﺯﻭﺭ ﺳﮯ ﮨﻨﺴﺎ ﺗﮭﺎ

ﺩِﻝ ﺻﺎﻑ ﻟﮕﺘﺎ ﺗﮭﺎ ___ ﺭﻭﻧﮯ ﻭﺍﻻ ﮨﮯ

Just finished reading A thousand Splendid Suns. What a master piece.

“Of all the hardships a person had to face, none was more punishing than the simple act of waiting.”
― Khaled Hosseini, A Thousand Splendid Suns

From one of my fav books

“And that's the thing about people who mean everything they say. They think everyone else does too.”
― Khaled Hosseini, The Kite Runner

Maye ni maye! Me ek shikra yaar banaya!

Maye ni maye, main ik shikra yaar banaya

Ohde sir te kalgi
Ohde pairin chanjhar
O chog chugenda aaya

Ik ohde roop di dhup tikheri
dooja mehkan da tirhaya

Teeja ohda rang gulabi
O kise gori maan da jaya

Ishqe da ik palang nawari
Ve assan chanania vich daya

Tan di chadar ho gayi meli
Os pair jaan palange paya

Dukhan mere naina de koye
Te vich harr hanjuan da aaya

Sari raat gyi vich sochan
Os ae ki zulm kamaya

Subah savere layni vatna
We assan mal mal os navaya

Dehi de vichon niklan chingan
Ni sada hath gaya kumlaya

Churi kuttan ta oh kaunda naahi
Ve assan dil da maas khawaya

Ik uddari aisi mari
O murr watni na aaya

Maye ni..
Main ik shikra yaar banaya...

O my mother, I made a hawk my beloved,
A plume on his feet,
Bells on his feet!
He came pecking for grain!
His beauty was as sharp as sunlight,
And he was thirsty for fragnances!
Third, his color was like a red rose,
He must be son of a very fair mother!
A bed of love,
I laid for him under moonlight!
Sheet of this body was strained,
That very instant when he laid his feet over it!
Corner of my eyes hurt,
A flood of tears engulfed me!
All night long I tried to fathom,
How he could do this to me?
In early morning,
With beauty mix, I scrubbed and bathed his body!
There were flames coming out from the body,
My hand were burnt!
I crush food for him,
But he never ate!
So I fed him with flesh of my heart!
He took such a flight,
That he never returned back!
O my mother, I made a hawk my beloved….

The annoying me

I remember the last time i asked him too much about whats wrong with his mood he said, "you're too annoying". I wonder would he ever able to understand the pure feelings behind that annoyance of mine. Never. He's not much bothered about me. Never mind.

So its a really boring day at work. I am the only person in the whole block i guess, Thanks to Qadri sab. Yesterday trip to Khanpur was no less then a big big adventure. We had to pass beneath the containers placed the the entrance of Isb. Haye.

I am off from a couple of days. I don't know why. Sometimes i get off for no apparent reason. Well I have my fears. Which increase with every single day i spend with him. He always says he will tell me things when he will come to Pakistan. Fingers crossed. No, I don't want a surprise. It wont be pleasant. But he says he hasn't hidden anything from me and he says hes man of his words and, I, believe him. But, still, my fears are there..always there..i believe he was too much into someone, he never tells me that, for hes a close person. Gosh i hate that. He'd never share things with me. Anyway, again, NEVER mind.

I dont think I have been able to create my or ANY place in his heart all that long. I only wish i could. Wish he could see me. Though he knows i am involved and i am madly in love with him, but whats the use of that. Well i dont ask love in return, for, this is not a trade..khair..i don't know what i want..I don't want to betray my parents.

Little Sam is a darling. I want to smash her in my arms.

I might be resigning soon. I am fed up of this routine, want to fly away somewhere. Where nobody knows me and I'd have a life of my own. My way. Thats not possible on earth i know. I really really really wish my degree ends soon. It their any way someone else can complete my degree on my part? Duh! I know the answer.

I am writing a blog after long. I dont know what else to do. Nothing to do at work. Allah boring.

#NP me hosh me tha to uss pe mar mita kese.

I am dizzy now. Bye Bye!

The typical me!

They say they don't like me coz I am typical. They say I question too much. They say they hate typical shaki women. Will they ever know how I feel about them? How much I love them? Is it my fault if I am too possessive for them? Or if I am too sensitive when it comes to them? Allah has made me like that...He has made me develop my feelings..
I know they start taking you for granted. But they should know,  there won't be another Mariyah in the universe, who can love them the way I do. I can bet on this. And they will surely miss me when I'll be no more to question them, to bug them, they will miss the typical Mariyah when she won't be around. And no, I am not hurt, I am just...nothing...

Sardiyan

Gul-e-zuban pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai
Tumhari Haan pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai

Darakht pr jo kabi chooriyon se dala tha
Us ek nishan pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai

Ye aik hm k nayi boliyan sada bolen
Teri zuban pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai

Sulag rahi hain zehan me qubayen lafzon ki
Magar zuban pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai

Tumharay anay pe sooraj k hath chamken ge
Mere makan pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai

Har aik simt pighalnay lagay hain sanatay
Tere bayan pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai

Jahan jahan pe teri khushbu k rang bikhray hain
Wahan wahan pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai

Wo Haan kre ga baharon me uska wada tha
Us aik Haan pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai

Wo muj ko sonp gya furqaten December me
Darakht-e-jaan pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai

Hamaray lab to duayen jalae rakhtay hain
Par aasman pe wohi sardiyon ka mosam hai..

-MeeM-

Ajab pagal sa larka hai!!

Ajeeb pagal sa lrka hai
wo mujse jb b milta hai
muje har bar kehta hai
tere hone se meri zat ki tkmeel hoti hai
usy malum b hai me to khud ek aam lrki hu
mgr wo mujse kehta hai
nahi tm sa koi duja

Ajeeb pagal sa lrka hai

wo mujse jb b milta hai
nya ek nam deta hai, nai pehchan deta hai
mere andr k sb mosam bina mere kahe hi wo hmesha
jan leta hai
meri brson purani bat b wo yad rkhta hai
muje hr bar kehta hai
teri awaz ka jadu muje sony nahi deta

Ajeeb pagal sa lrka hai

wo mujse jb b milta hai
to pehron muj ko tkta hai
usy hr rng jo mene ho pehna, acha lgta hai
use hr khuab jo mene ho dekha, scha lgta hai

Ajeeb pagal sa lrka hai

use mere hina-i hath tkna acha lgta hai
use mujko muji ko sochne ki jane kia zid hai
ho din ka koi b lmha, andheri rat ka pal ho
wo mujko socha krta hai, muji ko yad rkhta hai

ajab pagal sa lrka hai

wo mujse jb b milta hai
hzaron bar kehta hai
muje tmse mohabat hi nahi hai ishq hai jana
bs ek pal me wo apna ap mujko sonp deta hai
me us pagal se lrke k liye ab or kia likhu

muje usko btana hai

k uski muskurahat pr
me duniya war skti hu
bs uski aik ahat pr
me jeewan har skti hu
muje us se mohabat hai
muje b ishq hai us se

Ajeeb pagal sa lrka hai
Ajeeb pagal c me b hu!!!

Taaj Mahal!

Taaj tere liye ik mazhar-e-ulfat hi sahi,
Tujh ko is vaadi-e-rangin se aqeedat hi sahi,
Mere mahaboob kahin aur milaa kar mujh se!


Bazm-e-Shaahi mein ghareebon ka guzar kya ma'ani,
Sabt jis raah pe ho'n satwat-e-Shaahi ke nishaan,
Us pe ulfat bhari roohon ka safar kya ma'ani.


Meri mahaboob pas-e-pardah-e-tash'heer-e-wafaa,
Tu ne satwat ke nishaanon ko to dekha hota,
Murda shaahon ke maqaabir se bahalnewaali,
Apne taareek makaanon ko to dekha hota.


Anginat logon ne duniyaa mein muhabbat ki hai,
Kaun kahta hai ki saadiq na the jazbe un ke,
Lekin un ke liye tash'heer ka saamaan nahin,
Kyun ke wo log bhi apni hi tarah muflis the.


Ye imaaraat-o-maqaabir ye faseelein, ye hisaar,
Mutl-qulhukm shahanshahon ki azmat ke sutoon,
Daaman-e-dahr pe us rang ki gulkaari hain,
Jis mein shaamil hai tere aur mere ajdaad ka Khoon.


Meri mahboob! unhein bhi to muhabbat hogi,
Jinki sannayi' ne bakhshi hai isey shakl-e-jameel,
Un ke pyaaron ke maqaabir rahe benaam-o-namood,
Aaj tak un pe jalayi na kisi ne qandeel.


Ye chamanzaar ye Jamuna ka kinara ye mahal,
Ye munaqqash dar-o-diwaar, ye mehraab ye taakh,
Ek shahanshah ne daulat ka sahara le kar,
Ham ghareebon ki muhbbat ka udaya hai mazaakh.
Mere mahabuub kahin aur milaa kar mujhse!!

Sahir Ludheyanvi

تمام شد

آنکھوں سے خواب، دل سے تمنا تمام شد
تم کیا گئے، کہ شوقِ نظارا تمام شد

کل تیرے تشنگاں سے یہ کیا معجزہ ہوا
دریا پہ ہونٹ رکھے، تو دریا تمام شد

دنیا تو ایک برف کی سل سے سوا نہ تھی
پہنچی ذرا جو آنچ، تو دنیا تمام شد

عشاق پر یہ اب کے عجب وقت آپڑا
مجنوں کے دل سے حسرت لیلٰی تمام شد

شہرِ دل تباہ میں پہنچوں تو کچھ کھلے
کیا بچ گیا ہے راکھ میں، اور کیا تمام شد

ہم شہرِ جاں میں آخری نغمہ سنا چکے
سمجھو کہ اب ہمارا تماشا تمام شد

اک یاد یار ہی تو پس انداز ہے حسن
ورنہ وہ کار عشق تو کب کا تمام شد

حسن عباس رضا

وہ درد، وہ وفا، وہ محبت تمام شُد
لے! دل میں ترے قرب کی حسرت تمام شُد

یہ بعد میں کُھلے گا کہ کس کس کا خُون ہوا
ہر اِک بیاں ختم، عدالت تمام شُد

تُو اب تو دشمنی کے بھی قابل نہیں رہا
اُٹھتی تھی جو کبھی وہ عداوت تمام شُد

اب ربط اک نیا مجھے آوارگی سے ہے
پابندیء خیال کی عادت تمام شُد

جائز تھی یا نہیں، ترے حق میں تھی مگر
کرتا تھا جو کبھی وہ وکالت تمام شُد

وہ روز روز مرنے کا قصہ ہوا تمام
وہ روز دِل کو چِیرتی وحشت تمام شُد

محسن میں کُنجِ زیست میں چُپ ہوں پڑا
مجنُوں سی وہ خصلت و حالت تمام شُد

Mein Ne Is Tor Se Chaha Tujhe!!

Mein Ne Is Tor Se Chaha Tujhy Aksar Janaan

Jaisy Mehtab Ko Be.ant Samandar Chahey 

Jaisy Soraj Ki Kiran Seep K Dil Me Utrey 

Jaisy Khushboo Ko Hawa Rang Se Hat Kar Chahey


Jaisy Pathar Ke Kalaije Se Kiran Phootti Hai 

Jaisy Ghunchy Khuly Mousam Se Hina Mangtey Hein 

Jaisy Khuaboun Mein Khyaloun Ki Kaman Tootti Hei 

Jaisy Barish Ki Dua Aabla Pa Mangty Hein


Mera Her Khuwab Mere Sach Ki Gawahi De Ga 

Wosat.E.Deed Ne Tujh Se Teri Khuahish Ki Hei 

Meri Sochon Me Kabhi Dekh Sarapa Apna 

Mein Ne Dunya Se Alag Teri Parastish Ki Hei


Khahish.E.Deed Ka Mousam Jo Kabhi Dhundla Howa 

Noch Dali Hein Zamanon Ki Naqabein Mein Ne 

Teri Palkon Pe Utarti Hoi Subhon K Liye 

Torr Dali Hein Sitaroon Ki Tanabein Mein Ne


Mein Ne Chaha Ke Tere Husan Ki Gulnar Fiza

 Meri Ghazalon Ki Qataron Se Dehekti Jaey 

Mein Ne Chaha Ke Mere Fun Ke Gulistan Ki Bahar 

Teri Ankhon Ke Gulabon Se Mehakti Jaey


Tey To Ye Tha Ke Sajata Rahy Lafzon Ke Kanwal 

Mere Khamosh Kheyalon Mein Takalum Tera 

Raqs Karta Rahy Bharta Rahy Khushbo Ka Khumar 

Meri Khahish Ke Jazeeron Me Tabasum Tera


Tu Magar Ajnabi Mahool Ki Parwarda Kiran 

Meri Bujhti Hoi Raton Ko Sehar Kar Na Saki 

Teri Sanson Me Maseehai Thi Lekin Tu Bhi 

Chara.E.Zakham, Gham.E.Deeda.E.Tar Kar Na Saki


Tujh Ko Ehsas Hi Kab Hai Ke Kisi Dard Ka Dagh 

Ankh Se Dil Me Utar Jaey To Kiya Hota Hei 

Tuu Ke Seemab Tabiyat Hei Tujhy Kiya Maloom 

Mousam.E.Hijar Thehar Jaey To Kiya Hota Hai


Tu Ne Us Morr Pe Torra Hei Taluq Ke Jahan 

Dekh Sakta Nahi Koi Bhi Palat Kar Janan 

Ab Ye Aalam He Ke Ankhein Jo Khulein Gi Apni 

Yaad Aaye Ga Teri Deed Ka Manzar Janan

Mujh Se Mange Ga Tere ehad.E.Mohabbat Ka Hisaab 

Tere Hijran Ka Dehakta Howa Mehshar Janaan 

Youn Mere Dil Ke Barabar Tera Ghum Aya Hei 

Jaisy Sheeshy Ke Muqabil Koi Pathar Janaan


Jaisy Mehtab Ko Be.Ant Samandar Chahy 

Mein Ne Is Tor Se Chaha Tujhy Aksar Janan!!

Me ab sonay se darta hun!

کہا تھا نا !!!!

مجھے تم اس طرح سوتے مت چھوڑ کر جانا
مجھے بیشک جگا دینا
بتا دینا کے
محبت کے سفر میں ساتھ میرے چل نہیں سکتے
جدائی میں ہجر میں ساتھ میرے چل نہیں سکتے
تمہیں راستہ بدلنا ہے
میری حد سے نکلنا ہے
تمہیں کس بات کا ڈر تھا
تمہیں جانے نہیں دیتا
ارے پاگل !!!
محبت کی طبیعت میں
زبردستی نہیں ہوتی
جسے راستی بدلنا ہو
اسے راستہ بدلنے سے
جسے حد سے نکلنا ہو
اسے حد سے نکلنے سے
نہ کوئی روک پایا ہے
نہ کوئی روک پائے گا
تمہیں کس بات کا ڈر تھا
مجھے بیشک جگا دیتے
تمہیں میں دیکھ ہی لیتا
تمہیں کوئی دعا دیتا
کم از کم یوں تو نہ ہوتا
میرے پاس حقیقت ہے !
تمہارے بعد کھونے کے لئے
کچھ بھی نہیں باقی
مگر خود کو کھو جانے سے ڈرتا ہوں
میں اب سونے سے ڈرتا ہوں..

"Har aik ko bhikari bana kar rastay me bithaya hua hai, or har aik khud ko malik samjhta hai. Jab tak thokar nahi lagti, jab tak ghutnon par nahi girta apni aukaat ka pata hi nahi chalta. Wajood k naseeb me hai bhikari hona, bas zaat bhikari nahi ho sakti. Wajood k muqadar me mangna hai, zaat ka wasf dena hai.
Me to kia bibi! Sab bhikari hain. Aaj nahi to kal, kal nahi to parson
kabhi na kabhi bhikari banna hi parta hai. Mangna hi hota hai.
Koi Ishq mangta hai, koi Duniya, or jo ye nahi mangta wo Khuahish Ka Khatam hona mangta hai."
-Shehr-e-Zaat-

Meri sochain badalti ja rahi hain!

Meri sochain badalti ja rahi hain,
Ke yeh cheezain badalti ja rahi hain,

Tamasha aik hai roz-e-azal se,
Fakat aankhain badalti ja rahi hain,

Badalte manzron ke aayine mein,
Teri yadain badalti ja rahi hain,

Dilon se jorrti thi jo dilon ko,
Woh sab rasmain badalti ja rahi hain,

Adhoori, na’mukamma khawhishain kyon,
Neyi shaklain badati ja rahi hain,

Agar manzil wohi hai rahiyon ki,
To kyon raahain badati ja rahi hain,

Najaney kyon mujhe lagta hai Amjad,
Ke woh nazrain badalti ja rahi hain..

Zindagi ...Taiz Bohat Taiz Hawa Ka Jhonka!

Zindagi ...Taiz Bohat Taiz Hawa Ka Jhonka
Jalti Bhujti Hoi Shamai'n Mai Mah-o-Saal Meray
Dhalta Soraj Meray Mazi Ki Lehad Ka Katba
Rag-e-Sehra Ki Lakeerain Hain Khod-o-Khaal Meray


Chaand Meray Tan-e-Majrooh Pay Sang-e-Aizaz
Dhoop Chaoo'n Meray Sad-e-Chaak Libadahy Ka Kihraj
SUb Sitaray Meri Pooshaak Kay Paiwand-e-Naheef
Meray Ansoo'n Mera Virsa Meri Ankhoo'n Ka Mizaaj


Mera Cherah Meray Maqtool Huner Ki Tarigh
Meri Ankhai'n Meri Dukhti Hoi Ankhoo'n Kay Chiraagh
Meray Hontoo'n Pay Meri Piyaas Kay Nohoo'n Ka Hajoom
Meray Seenay Pay Darakhshan Meri Toheen Kay Dagh


Ajj Ki Sham Kay, Kay Her Saal Isi Shaam Kay Sath
Meri Ukhri Hoi Sansoo'n Mai Grirah Lagti Hai
Aasmaa'n Waqat Kay Anchal Ki Dhanak Bunta Hai
Sari Dharti Tan-e-Uryaa'n Ki Zirra Lagti Hai


Ajj Ki Shaam Kay Her Saal Meray Gham Nawaz
Muskuraatay Howay Kuch Phool Atta Kartay Hain
Kuch Maseeha Meri Khatir Mera Dil Rakhnay Ko
Khat Mai Jeenay Ki Duaa Behj Dia kartay Hain


Saal-ha-Saal Guzernay Pay Bhi Aai Dil-e-Zidgaa'n
Ajj Ki Shaam Manatay Howay Dar Lagta Hai
Muskuraatay Howay Chehroon Kay Bhanwar Hain Lakin
Akhri Shamma Jalatay Howay Dar Lagta Hai


Dil Dharakta Hai Kay Jalti Hoi Shammo'n Ka Dhowaa'n
Shula-e-Karab Mai Tehleel Na Ho Jai Kaheen
Ji Larrazta Hau Manzer Kay Adhiray Pan Ki
Ajj Ki Shaam Takmeel Na Ho Jai Kaheen...!!!


Aao Kuch Dair Ko Hum Zakhum Shumari Kar Lain
Orr Kuch Dair Mai Her Shamma Pighal Jai Gi
Ajj Ki Bazam Mai Kho Jain, Kaheen So Jain
Ajj Ki Shaam Bhi Kuch Dair Mai Dhal Jai Gi
Jalti Bhujti Shamoo'n Ka Bharosa Kaisa?
Zindegi Taiz Bohat Taiz Hawa Ka Jhonka....!!!

Baat to zara si hai..baat umer bhar ki hai!!

zindagi k mele main
khvahishon k rele main
tum se kya kahen jana
is qadar jhamele main
vaqt ki ravani hai
bakht ki girani hai
sakht bezamini hai
sakht lamakani hai
hijr k samandar main
takht aur takhte ki
ek hi kahani hai
tum ko jo sunani hai
~ ~ ~
bat go zara si hai
bat umr bhar ki hai
umr bhar ki baten kab
do ghari main hoti hain
dard k samandar main
anginat jaziren hain
beshumar moti hain
ankh k dariche main
tum ne jo sajaya tha
bat us diye ki hai
bat us gile ki hai
jo lahu ki khilvat main
chor ban k ata hai
lafz k fasilon par
tut tut jata hai
~ ~ ~
zindagi se lambi hai
bat ratjage ki hai
raste main kaise ho
bat takhliye ki hai
takhliye ki baton main
guftagu izafi hai
pyar karne valon ko
ik nigah kafi hai
ho saky to sun jao
ek din akale main
tum se kya kahen jana
is qadar jhamele main!!

'Shattering'

I know it seems like I'm this strong person who can get through anything, but inside I'm fragile. I've had so many things thrown at me, and each one has only made a crack. What I'm afraid of is shattering.